Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts

Monday, June 8, 2015

Changing Course

Feeling much better physically and mentally. 

I still occasionally have self-defeating thoughts, though. I overthink things. I'm constantly
examining and re-examining myself and my actions. I make assumptions about what others
think or will think about me and I base my self-worth on what I interpret that to be. 


Wow. I guess it sounds like I don't feel all that much better mentally after all.

Okay. I'm sitting here on a Monday morning. Fighting these demons. I can either give in to them, or I can work through them. 

What can I do today to change my course?
  1. DIET - I need to eat a healthy, balanced, properly portioned diet; and not just because I recently had my gall bladder out. Research is now supporting what we've all suspected: maintaining a healthy diet helps maintain a healthy mind. 
  2. EXERCISE - I cannot do strength or core training (e.g., yoga, Pilates) for a while, but I can get some oxygen in my blood and blood in my brain. 
  3. SLEEP!! - I need to get about 8 hours of quality sleep, falling asleep in the dark without the TV on or iPhone in hand.
  4. PRAYER/MEDITATION - There are mixed reviews in scientific literature about the link between prayer/meditation and mental health, but I believe it does work. When I have prayed regularly, I've been centered and less anxious.
"Rome wasn't built in a day", you know. I think I'll start small and gradually add on. First things first: sleep and diet. Then, later this week, add walking in the neighborhood for about twenty minutes and morning prayer and meditation.

I'll let you know how it goes.

_____________________


Here are some interesting reads if you want to know more:

DIET

EXERCISE



SLEEP





PRAYER/MEDITATION











Saturday, May 3, 2014

Physical Wellness - Getting Back on Track

Me and my beautiful daughter Rachael - September '13
Okay folks. Along time ago, I posted about the things one should do to be well - physically. (See Wellness Part I - Physical.) Isn't it funny how good we are at giving out advice, but fail to do ourselves the very things we are advising!

I have been very good about taking my medication, pretty good about getting the sleep I need, and terrible about everything else. 

I recently saw a picture of myself, and I was heavier than I have ever been. Well, that is about to change. I intend to follow my own advice, and I want to take you along with me. Once a week, I'll share with you my struggles and my progress. 

Here are the things I will commit to (taken from the original post): 
  1. Obviously, take medication (if any) as prescribed by your doctor; and don't deviate from it without your doctor's permission.
  2. Take any supplements your doctor has recommended. For example, my GP has me taking Calcium w/vitamin D and a multi-vitamin; and my psychiatrist has added 2 - 3 fish oil capsules per day. I also temporarily take iron supplements, as I'm slightly anemic.
  3. Get 7.5 - 8 hours sleep each night; and go to bed and wake up at the same time each day.
  4. Drink about 2 liters of water per day - more if you are exercising hard, are on medication, and / or you are spending a lot of time in hot weather or dry climates.
  5. Exercise 4 - 5 times per week employing the fitness triad: aerobic (e.g., walking, running, swimming, biking), strength training (e.g., free weights), and flexibility training (e.g., yoga, stretching). (Obviously again, check with your physician before starting any exercise program.) Aerobic exercise in particular releases feel-good endorphins in your brain, strength training builds body confidence and strength, and flexibility helps prevent injury and reduces stress.
  6. Eat properly. It has been my personal experience that the following serve me best mentally {and physically}:
  • Eat (5) portioned mini-meals per day, approximately every 2 - 3 hours. 
  • Each meal should contain (1) lean protein portion, (1) complex carbohydrate portion, and at least one vegetable portionSome example of portions: protein is the size of a deck of cards; a carb, the size of a light bulb or tennis ball; and a slice of cheese is the size of a domino. 
  • Eat at least (5) vegetables and eat (4) fruits per day.
  • Limit simple sugar (white bread, white rice,white pasta, bottled juice from store, table sugar, etc.)
  • Limit butter and saturated fats. This is old news, I know; but it is true. Olive oil, olive oil, olive oil is good for the brain. Use it, damn it!
  • Do not drink diet sodas and avoid sugar substitute. {The latter is my idea - I just don't trust 'em.}
  • Limit caffeine and don't have caffeine after 2 or 3 PM. {As a chemical addict, this is the hardest of all for me!} Note that I didn't say eliminate, just limit. This is especially important for those suffering from anxiety.
  • Do not drink alcohol - obvious for an alcoholic / drug addict, but critical too for someone with depression and anxiety - especially when on medication. 
  • See http://www.choosemyplate.gov/http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/coping-with-anxiety/AN01589, and http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/food-and-mood/my00716 for some more examples of proper eating.
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Today is the baseline day.  I weighed in at 180. Well, off I go to get started - see you next Saturday!






Thursday, March 13, 2014

The Raging River

I woke up this morning with the image of a glass of garnet colored wine in my mind. I could taste it on my tongue; I could smell the earthy cork...

Then I caught myself. Even eight years into recovery, I occasionally get a reminder that the gremlin is still alive and well deep inside me, just waiting for me to slip up. Just one drop on the tongue and the ground beneath me could crumble. 

Well, relapse isn't quite that simple. It comes much earlier than the actual drink, pill, shot, or smoke. Relapse begins when we fail to attend to our recovery on a daily basis.

My recovery counselor said that we are always relapsing; and he shared a great metaphor with us: Envision a raging river leading up to a waterfall. The river is the power of our addiction; and in order to maintain recovery, we must always be rowing upstream. The moment we stop, we slip closer to the waterfall. The waterfall, however, is the act of drinking, e.g., though, and not the relapse. The relapse occurs much earlier - somewhere in the rapids. The question we must always ask ourselves is how close are we to the edge. If we are too close, we better start rowing!

What do we do to row and get further upstream? Here are some ideas:

  • Go to a meeting (AA, NA, GA, any support group)
  • Tell someone who understands and is familiar with your addiction. Heck, if you have no one, contact me! pink.hi.tops@gmail.com  I'd be happy to chat with you!!
  • Get that bloody 8 hours of sleep a night!!! 
  • Limit the simple sugars in your diet. Eat a protein- / complex carb-balanced diet which includes lots of vegetables and fruits.
  • Drink half your body weight (pounds) in ounces of water.
  • Exercise - especially aerobic (e.g., running, walking, Zumba, aerobics, cycling).
  • Pour yourself into a hobby.
  • Read something inspiring.
  • Laugh! Watch a comedy (preferably not Cheech and Chong's Up in Smoke...)
  • Get out into nature: Touch and feel the bark on a tree! Smell a flower! Look at the beautiful waterfalls and feel the spray on your face. Listen to the sounds of the waves crashing on the shore and the seagulls screeching above. Look up into the night sky and count the number of satellites you see. You get the picture...
  • Connect with an animal. Dogs, cats, horses, and other pets are wonderful therapists!
  • Now that I think about it, connect with your therapist; and if you don't have one, get one.

So now that I've had that dream, where am I on the river? How close am I to the falls? Which of the above am I going to do today to keep myself rowing?

Monday, March 10, 2014

Good Day Sunshine!



I have blogged before about the importance of sleep for mental health; and today, of all days during the year, I feel this need most keenly. [See Recovery step #2: sleep, damn it! (3/5/13)] 

Daylight Savings Time. Ugh!! On the surface the idea seems great; but in reality, it sucks! I know it is only a one hour difference, but that one hour kills me every time!

This morning, I sleep-drove my daughter to school in the dark again for the first time in a month. Then I came home and went back to sleep - for three hours! I overslept and was late taking my time-sensitive dose of Effexor; and I spent the rest of the day grumpy and in a fog.

So what is the alternative? Skip the Daylight Savings Time altogether? I don't know, maybe. Or...move it to a different day - a brilliant idea that's so elegantly simple it just might work!

I don't normally get "political" on this blog, for obvious reasons. But this is an exception. There is a petition that was started yesterday (see http://wh.gov/ly64X) to switch the hour-change from Saturday at midnight to Friday afternoon - thus extending the daylight on an afternoon as you enter the weekend! No sleep lost or weekend cut short - just daylight gained! Think of what this would do for the restaurant and entertainment industry - a little economy boost with the extra Friday hour! Think of what this would do for your psyche!!

If this sounds good to you, I would ask that you check it out, sign the petition, and share it on Facebook, Twitter, and anywhere else you can think of to get the momentum going. We need a lot of signatures to get the White House's attention, but with your help I know we can do it. Please join me in supporting a win-win idea that will benefit all!

Here is the petition: http://wh.gov/ly64X

Friday, February 7, 2014

Friday Funk

Happy Friday all!

I am so tired today. I put whole beans in the paper basket of my coffee maker and wondered why it came out all watery...

It's cause I'm not sleeping right - violating all the rules. Going to bed whenever; falling asleep in a crumpled heap on a couch that is a foot and a half too short; sleeping with the light on because I'm too tired to turn it off; sleeping with the TV on...all night. It's no good!

And now I'm in a funk! The Vortex is looking more attractive, while only last week, I was doing so well! Gotta re-group today and get back on track.




Monday, November 11, 2013

Adjusting Course

I was still struggling last week to keep out of the gravity of the Vortex...thus the lack of blogging. It finally got to a point where I had to see my therapist and psychiatrist. I simply could not un-rut myself.

Even though I am definitely better than I was a little over a year ago, my therapist says my thinking is obsessive and I over-analyze myself and my environment.

I met with my psychiatrist too, and he tweaked my meds. He reminded me about the importance of taking medication at the same time everyday, which I had not been doing. He also reminded me about the importance of proper sleep hygiene - turning off the TV, computer, and any glowing monitors/screens about one hour before bed-time, and settling down into quiet time before getting a full-night's sleep (8 hours).

Since, I met with him on Friday, I have been doing this; and dare I say, I am feeling a little better already. I wasn't tired and wiped out when I woke up this morning. I felt...refreshed!

I may have been blogging about this topic for almost a year now, but I don't think I had fully bought into the notion that I have a disease. My depression and anxiety is a psychological and physical disease that requires treatment and lifestyle modifications - much in the same way as heart disease or diabetes. I have said it over and over, but I am only now believing it. And now I'm going to make real progress in my recovery!









Sunday, July 14, 2013

Anxiety Again

For the first time in a very long time, I feel anxiety gnawing at me - a prickly static of constant worry about absolutely nothing. I forgot what that felt like, because the medication had been working so well. 

I have been a bit off lately with what I need to do to stay mentally healthy. Once again, my sleep schedule is out of whack; and as usual, I haven't been exercising. In addition, I haven't been taking my medication properly - e.g., taking it at 8:00 am one day, and at 11:30 am the next; and missing doses altogether. 

I know you are probably tired of hearing this, but I really, really have to get back on track.

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An hour later...

Well, I did it. I exercised for the first time in two (or more?) months, but it wasn't my idea. My husband has been watching me sink backwards and rallied the troops this morning for a family bike ride to Starbucks. I'm glad now that we went, but getting me up and dressed was nothing short of an exorcism! 



The trick will be making sure I get to bed by 11:00 tonight, taking my pills on time, and exercising again tomorrow. I have to have faith that sticking to these basics will pay off in the very near future - if I can just hang in until then.








Tuesday, April 23, 2013

can't sleep...

4:09 AM EDT

i cannot sleep. I fell asleep last night before taking one of my anti-depressants - the one that also assists with REM sleep - and I had a grande Pike {Starbucks} at 6:30 PM. i had to get up to go to the bathroom - which is becoming an almost nightly ritual given the amount of water I drink before bed just to avoid the kind of cotton mouth that turns my tongue into a dessicated shellfish at low tide.

so after returning to bed, i could not fall back to sleep. my mind started swimming: "i'm behind in school - with only two and a half weeks left of the semester!", "my house is in dissarray!", "i have to eat well...i have to feed my family better...", "kim jong un and the Taliban of Afghanistan are holding the rest of the world back from progress and they must be eliminated"...you know, the usual mental musings of 4 AM.

okay, let's back up before kim jong un-stable and the Taliban leaders losers...

here i am again. behind in everything. and yet, I know I am fully capableof doing what I need to do. others who have it far worse in life are able to rise to the occasion, overcome their predicaments, and succeed - why is it so damn difficult for me?! why do i create so many obstacles for myself?

my stomach is in knots about how far behind i am in school, in housework, in physical fitness, etc. and what a steep climb it is to get myself unstuck and back on track. i just don'tknow how i'm gonna do it!!

sorry to be less than illuminating...after all it is now just 4:43 am.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Unleash Your Soul!




This is the theme of the day!

I just awoke from a good night's sleep - full of optimism and grateful to be alive. 

I wish you, dear reader, a wonderful day / night. Let us unleash our souls...and let the games begin!!

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Recovery Step #2: Sleep, Damn It!



Sleep that knits up the raveled sleave of care
The death of each day’s life, sore labour’s bath
Balm of hurt minds, great nature’s second course,
Chief nourisher in life’s feast.

- William Shakespeare, Macbeth


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Walking around with frog eyes, feeling like my head’s in a fishbowl, repeating myself in conversations, repeating myself...oh...and forgetting what I’m doing when mid-task: this is me without sufficient sleep.

Sleep disorders are symptomatic of depression, to be sure; but I think the number one thing you can do for yourself and your sanity is to get a good night’s sleep, damn it! For me it makes all the difference in the world – in fact, the benefit is exponential!
ME after a night of 5-hours of sleep...

Adults need between 7 – 9 hours good sleep each night. According to Dr. Timothy Morgenthaler, M.D. of the Mayo Clinic [see MayoClinic.com]: 

Although some people claim to feel rested on just a few hours of sleep at night, research shows that people who sleep so little over many nights don't perform as well on complex mental tasks as do people who get closer to seven hours of sleep at night. Additionally, studies among adults show that getting much more or less than seven hours of sleep a night is associated with a higher mortality rate.

Did you read that...don't perform as well on complex mental tasks....higher mortality rate!

Make no mistake about it, neither you nor I can get well and stay well without healthy sleep habits. But what are good sleep habits anyway?

The Mayo Clinic suggests the following 7 steps for a healthful sleep (see MayoClinic.com):

1.  Stick to a sleep schedule: Even on weekends and, yes, holidays; hard to do, but I'll give it a try.  

2. Pay attention to what you eat and drink: Don’t eat too close to bedtime, don’t go to bed hungry either; and watch the nicotine, caffeine, or alcohol intake. Frankly, in my opinion, regarding the nicotine and alcohol…don’t even!! just DON’T EVEN!!! {More on that in a future post.}
ME after a night of 7.5 hours sleep :)

3. Create a bedtime ritual: Create a soothing, quiet ritual to help you wind down - take a warm bath, read, meditate, or say your prayers. It works great for children, and works well for you and me too!

4. Get comfortable: Having a comfy bed with snuggly comforter, pillows, and PJs encourage good sleep {no problem for me here!}

5. Limit daytime naps: This one goes out to my husband...

6. Add physical activity to your daily routine: Preferably early in the day, so you are not too energized at bedtime.

7. Manage stress: Yes, I know, I know – easier said than done, but a crucial part of healthy sleep.

And of course, as the Mayo Clinic adds, if you continue to have difficulty getting to sleep, staying asleep, or waking up in the morning, see a doctor. 

{It’s important to remind you here too: I am NOT a doctor; I am not a psychologist or licensed counselor; I am a patient just searching for (and sharing) ways to get well.}